fun in the tactical operations center
1.) I, Sgt. Chris Bray, do now solemnly swear and assert that I personally know of an incident in which a second shift master sergeant compelled a PFC to do push-ups...over the phone. Multiple witnesses to the incident confirm that the sounds of pushing-up, to include both grunting and counting, were heard over the telephone. In post-event analysis, TOC staff split over whether or not the PFC was totally, like, faking it and shit. An NCO on third shift conducted a complete forensic simulation of a PFC pretending to do push-ups over the phone, but this simulation was not regarded as dispositive.2.) So the television just suddenly shut itself off, right at the end of a mediocre movie on Channel 10 of the Armed Forces Network. All eyes went to the remote control, sitting untouched and several feet away from any TOC personnel. Long pause. And then the third shift battle NCO, speaking into the silence in his best scary old lady voice, urged Carol-Ann not to go into the light. Other TOC personnel showed no sign that they recognized the cultural reference. Third shift battle NCO sighed heavily.
posted by Chris Bray @ 4:12 PM
2 Comments:
You're not speaking of yourself in the third person again, are you? You know, Hank Adams did that and although he got a Pulitzer out of the deal, it was posthumous. Not quite worth it, Kafka thinks.
Hank Adams -- is that the guy from, like, the old days?
Ready to come home, now. But what the hell.
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